It�s just� I don�t know. Cody was there. I�m not mad at him anymore: he, for one, didn�t read my diary. The Wall was there: I told him to get his fucking class ring that the front desk called about, and that was all I said to him.
I got left at the capitol: and yeah, I could have tried to find everyone, but they were halfway across the collage campus, and the thing is? It�s different for young women then it is for boys and the middle aged. I�m not going to run around all alone in the dark in a city I don�t know at all, just asking to be fucking raped.
At the hotel afterwards, Me, Rachel, And Shelby had to share a room with Devin and Hannah. I asked this morning if anyone had been mad at me the night before, when I was a missing person (officially: the police were involved) for an hour. My girls said no, everyone was really really worried about me, but Hannah said something different:
�Well, a few of the people sitting behind me.� She said, her eyebrow rising superiorly. �Like Pav, and Alie, and some of those people.� I didn�t like the way she seemed happy about it. I still don�t. Cody was one of the people sitting behind her. And I couldn�t give a damn as to what Pav and Alie think, but I do care what Cody thinks. Deeply. And the way that her mouth curled with pleasure, even though she tried to suppress it, felt like a knife in my stomach, cold and victorious, as if Cody, too, had been loudly hating on me for making him wait.
And that hurts. A lot.